The eleventh commandment

"Thou shalt not piss and moan too much”.I remember while I was going for my bachelors degree, my mother became morbidly ill and was staying at a hospital nearby the campus. After classes I would stop by her room to visit. I must’ve reeked from having smoked a couple of cigarettes, as I neared my mother’s bed she acted as if she was smoking a phantom cigarette, bringing her two fingers close to her lips and taking an imaginary puff. Back then and years later I was a defiant and obstinate smoker, Friends told me that they could smell the smoke all the time. I absolved myself by smoking outside reasoning that the air and wind would prevent the smoke from attaching to me. But the images of my mother reaching out for and smoking an imaginary cig were very profound, unfortunately not shocking enough as I continued to smoke for years after her passing.- I was making my way toward my favorite bus stop when I came upon a homeless woman who had set up temporary quarters at the stop. She was maybe in her mid 30s, looked as if she had been at war with the elements and lost a few battles. The veins in her eyes shot out like bolts from a Tessla coil. She reached down to the seat and picked up an imaginary pipe, pretended to have lighted it and proceeded to take imaginary tokes. What she was smoking could be left to any one’s judgment or imagination including what was left of her’s. But with each hit she became more lethargic. This whole scenario reminded me of the visits with my mother in the hospital. However, I can’t figure what could’ve triggered her actions-except I usually wear a pea coat, maybe I reminded her of someone. But I was upset at the parallel that I made between this woman and my mother. I also became increasingly more upset with my dependence on public transportation. I’m tired of it, I’ve done my part and have played by the rules. I am leaving a small fraction of a percentage of a carbon footprint. I want to drive again! I want to brag about my ride, right now it’s the # 10 bus from Mission Hills toward College Ave. or Old Town. Sort of cramps my style if you catch my drift.